


The Height of Westlife

by SwedishGirl



Category: Westlife
Genre: Bickering, Friendship, Height Differences, M/M, Team Dynamics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-20
Updated: 2017-09-20
Packaged: 2019-01-01 02:10:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,790
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12146379
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SwedishGirl/pseuds/SwedishGirl
Summary: The lads are answering some questions from a magazine. When the question about how tall they are comes up, things get a little tense.





	The Height of Westlife

**Author's Note:**

> I'm a bit obsessed with how tall people are. The Westlife lads have stated how tall they are in different books and magazines, but it doesn't seem to be the correct numbers and I was curious to why anyone would lie about their height. This little story is my own take on the subject.

"-Okay lads, got some questions from this magazine." Kian said. "-It's the usual stuff. Can we go through them?"  
"-Let me see that." Nicky said, pulling the laptop away from Kian and putting it in front of himself on the coffee table. 

Nicky started to scroll. 

“-Okay, listen up. Favorite food, anyone?"  
"-Steak and mash!" Shane smiled.

“-Steak…and…mash…” Nicky typed.

"-Anything that my mum cooks." Mark said.  
“-Mummy’s boy…” Kian smirked.  
“-Get out of here, will ya.” Mark retorted and pulled a face.

"-Any phobias… That will be lifts for me…and birds for Mark." Nicky said, while typing the answer into the computer.  
“-What kind of a phobia is that, anyway? Birds, like?” Shane said.  
“-You know I was chased by a rooster when I was small. It was frightening.” Mark said, pouting his lips and looking like he was six years old again.  
“-Farmers kid.” Kian teased.  
“-Fuck off, Ki…” Mark said, pushing him gently.

"-Alright, what did you do before you became popstars?"  
"-Oh, God. I don't understand why they keep asking that. Everyone knows Nicky was a footballer, Shane was supposed to become an accountant and the rest of us were sort of too young to be working." Kian said.  
"-You worked at EJ Menswear in Sligo!" Nicky said.  
"-Yeah, well, on weekends and stuff like that. Shane did too."  
"-Don't forget about the kissogram!" Shane said.  
"-Get out of here will ya, that was just a few times."  
"-Nevertheless. We should put it in there. That is a great answer. Something interesting."  
"-I think we should write "stripper" actually. You know, to get the fans going." Nicky smirked.  
"-I think we should write that Mark was the stripper. That would definitely get the fans attention!" Kian said.

Mark just rolled his eyes and let out a deep breath.

"-Alright, guys. Listen up. What's your favorite place in the world? Kian?"  
"-I don't know, Barbados or something where the waves are good for surfing."  
"-I thought Mullaghmore north of Sligo had some of the highest waves in the world?" Mark asked.  
"-It probably has, but it's always fucking freezing."  
"-Okay. Shane?" Nicky interrupted.  
"-Um... To travel, you mean?"  
"-I don't fucking know, I didn't make these questions up!"  
"-Okay. Anywhere with a five star resort."  
"-An answer like that will make you look like a spoilt brat." Mark warned.  
"-Well, I am." Shane giggled.  
"-No, you’re not. Okay. Mark? Favorite place in the world?" Nicky said.  
"-Sligo."  
"-Aw, come on!"  
"-Well, it is! I've seen a lot of the world by now and there are many wonderful and lovely places. But Sligo will always be home, I don't want to live anywhere else."  
“-Country boy…” Kian mumbled.

Nicky shook his head and wrote "Sligo".

“-Who is the best cook?”  
“-Kian, maybe?” Shane suggested.  
“-I think it´s Mark.” Kian said.  
“-Hey! I´m a great cook! What´s the matter with you!?” Nicky said, sounding really annoyed.  
“-Well, the boiled chicken breasts were not the best thing I’ve eaten…” Mark said.  
“-We were in your house and I had to cook from what was available!” Nicky pointed out.  
“-You came straight from the supermarket, Nicky… You could have bought anything.” Mark reminded.  
“-Chicken breast is good!”  
“-But not boiled. With steamed broccoli. C’mon.”  
“-It’s healthy!”  
“-For your body maybe, but not for your soul.”  
“-So you’re saying I can’t cook, just because you don’t like my healthy food.”

Mark shook his head, realizing Nicky would not let this go unless Mark acknowledged Nicky’s cooking skills.

“-Your cooking is great, Nicky. Next question.” he said.

"-Who is the best singer?" Nicky asked.  
"-Shane". Mark said.  
"-It's me, actually." Nicky said.  
"-Mark is probably the most talented." Shane said.  
“-It’s me!!” Nicky yelled.  
"-Well it ain't me, lads!" Kian contributed.

"-Who is the laziest?"  
"-MARK!" all of the others agreed.

Mark snorted.

"-Who's got the biggest shoes?"  
"-Mark again." Shane said.

"-Who's got the worst morning mood?"  
"-What is this, are all the questions about Mark?!" Kian said.

"-Here's one for you, Ki. Who’s the grumpiest?"  
"-Fuck off, Nicky!" Kian said.

"-Eye color. Blue. Blue. Blue. Brown." he said to himself while typing.  
"-They're actually sort of hazel with a hint of green." Shane said.  
"-That’s ridiculous, Shane. I won’t write something like that." Nicky said.

"-Okay, so a few individual questions then. Kian, is it true that you are a Metallica fan?"  
"-Yes. Very much so."

"-Is it true that Nicky's dad was a singer in a cabaret band? As a matter of fact, yes." Nicky said.

“-Is it true that Shane’s parents ran a café in Sligo for 35 years?”  
“-True. The Carlton Café.” Shane said.

"-Mark, is it true that you have a really bad eyesight?"  
"-Unfortunately, yes."  
"-But you had surgery? That laser thing?" Shane asked.  
"-I did. It helped a bit back then, but it gets worse and worse you know."  
"-As you get older?"  
"-Don't think it's age related as such. I'm shortsighted."  
"-You still ditch the contact lenses when you're onstage, right?"  
"-I do. Not every time, but..."  
"-And it helps?"  
"-I think so. If I don't see the crowd clearly, I don't get that nervous. It’s a bit like being in my own little bubble."  
"-Being in your own little bubble, huh... Aren't you always...?" Nicky teased.

“-Speaking of which: Mark, which is the best book you've ever read?"  
"-Oh, God... I don't know... I read all the time."  
"-Okay. Anyone else? Shane?"  
"-I don't read books, so..."  
"-Kian?"  
"-Do I have to answer that one? Then I have to come up with something that's sounds really clever, you know."

"-Okay. A question for me. Is it true that your hair is actually ginger? What the fuck...? How did they know that? I'm not gonna answer that."

Shane and Kian laughed out loud.

"-It's on Google, Nicky. There are pictures of you as a footballer, all ginger." Shane said.  
"-I don't care. I'm the blonde one. Next question: Shane, is it true that you are the youngest of seven siblings?"  
"-Yepp. I'm the spoilt little cutie pie who got to do whatever I wanted." Shane giggled.  
"-We were also seven siblings." Kian said.  
"-Yeah, but you were not the youngest and cutest, like me." Shane joked.

"-Okay. How tall are you. Shane?"  
"-5 foot 9 inches."  
"-No you're not."  
"-Okay. 5 foot 8 inches.  
"-C'mon!"  
"-I am! Almost!"  
"-Shane!"  
"-Okay, 5'7" and three quarters."  
"-Okay. Kian?"  
"-Same as Shane, basically."  
"-Mark?"  
"-5'10"."  
"-You are not 5'10". I'm 5'10"!  
"-No way in hell you are 5'10", Nicky! You're just slightly taller than us! Half an inch at the most!" Kian said.  
"-I am, though." Nicky said, while starting to type.

"-You're not writing that, are you? It's obviously not true!" Kian said.  
"-How do you know?"  
"-It's obvious! You are maximum 5'8" and a half!"

Kian got up from the chair. He dragged Nicky up from his chair and placed himself back to back with him. 

"-Shane, how much difference?"  
"-Nicky is standing on his toes..." Shane said.  
"-Damn it, Nicky!" Kian said and pushed him slightly.

Nicky didn't want to be compared to Kian who had just admitted to being only 5'7" and three quarters. He didn't stand still.

"-He doesn't stand still, but I'd say half an inch maybe. Not a whole inch, anyway." Shane said.

Nicky swore and sat down.

"-Don't sit down. We're gonna compare you to Mark."  
"-To what purpose, he lies about his height!"  
"-So do you."  
"-So what is the point comparing us two?!"  
"-Just do it, will ya! You two have been lying about your height in interviews all your career. It's time we establish how tall you actually are. Anyone got a measuring tape?"  
"-I always carry one with me, but I seem to have forgotten it in my purse..." Shane joked.

Nicky tried to make himself as tall as possible, he even tried to stand on his toes a little but Kian noticed. Mark sagged as usual.

"-Mark, for Christ's sake, would you just stand up straight! Nicky, come on!"

Shane was studying them carefully.

"-Okay, look. They're not keeping still and they're not standing straight. But I would say the difference is about three inches. Maybe even more." he said.  
"-No way in hell!!" Nicky shouted.  
"-It is." Kian agreed.

Nicky was really really annoyed.

"-Okay, so I'm 5'10" and Mark is 6'1"!"  
"-Except he's not." Kian said.  
"-I'm not." Mark agreed.  
"-He could be. Easily. He's a big bloke. Powerfully built and that."  
"-Oh, thanks a lot Nicky..." Mark retorted and slapped him on the back of his head.  
"-And you are tiny." Kian contributed, sneering at Nicky.

Nicky gave Kian a glare.

Shane knew why this was a delicate subject for Nicky. Nicky had practically been sacked from Leeds United as he was too small for being a proper goalie. Nicky had sort of never gotten over it. Nicky was the most competitive person Shane had ever known, and it wasn’t hard to imagine how it must have felt when something he could not possibly do anything about - his height - was the reason he lost his chance to become a professional footballer.

“-Come here, will ya.” Kian said to Shane, while dragging Mark up to stand back to back with Shane.

“-Can you see that, Nicky? It’s a good four inches.” Kian said.  
"-Okay, can we agree on Mark being 6 foot then?"  
"-I'm not 6 foot. I don't want to be." Mark whined.  
"-I think you might be, actually. And Nicky is 5'8" and a half." Kian said.  
"-I'm not that tall!" Mark yelled.  
"-I'm not that small!!" Nicky shouted.

Kian rolled his eyes and Shane giggled. Mark and Nicky were like two stubborn kids. Kian was aware that Mark was sensitive about his size since being bullied about it both in school and in Westlife. But he still thought it was quite ridiculous. Mark wasn’t that big, he was tall and powerfully built but in a good way, nothing to be ashamed of. He was certainly not a giant, maybe six foot or slightly more but not anything extraordinary. Kian didn’t understand why Mark was so careful to always stand behind the other three in pictures, even crouching down a bit to look shorter. It was a shame, really. He should be proud of himself.

"-I can agree on 5'11", that's maximum." Mark said.  
"-Okay then. And I'm 5'9" and three quarters." Nicky said.  
"-Lads, no one will believe those numbers. It is obvious that Mark is at least three inches taller than you, Nicky." Kian said.  
"-Nevertheless." Nicky said and hit “save”, putting an end to the whole discussion.

"-Okay. Favorite color, everyone?"


End file.
